ebay

have been hearing lots of stuff being offered on ebay all the time... so i finally visited that web page and see what do they offer... and something caught my eye... a brand new limited yoyo that was sold in the 1990's.... i wanted that yoyo so much at that time... but i could not afford it... now i can... so i decided to buy it... but luck wasnt on my side... i needed a credit card only i could purchase it.... haiz.... who can help me with this problem???

boring days

my life now is so damn boring... have been complaining this for the past 4 months... and still doing it...mi never had so much free time in my life.... i was always busy doing 'stuff' whether its legalo or illegal.... now i cant do it anymore since i'm restricted by my motions... have been parctising to walk all this time... and finally i was able to move around better... today i even went out to eat lunch with my family members... when i was outside everyone was like staring at me... wondering why this young little boy is walking like this.... they must be pitying me.... haha... joking joking.... dunno how long would i have to walk in such a wierd way because of the pain... and be back normal again.... really looking forward to that day.... keeping fingers crossed.....

here comes the bad news again....

haiz... theres a bad news for me again.... looks like i will be admitted to HTAR next monday again... this time it will be for a renal biopsy.... hopefully things will be solved this time.... and it will be my last admission to this hospital for the time being.... i really hate staying in the hospital... its lonely staying alone there.... and the food sucks.... have to trouble other people to send food to me.... just keep my fingers crossed and hope this time everything will go smoothly...

dont know whats happening to me...

having a hard time this few days... i now dont even have the courage to just call a 'GIRL' friend to say hi... i kinda have a phobia towards girls now... i only dare to comunicate with them through writing but not face to face conversation... sounds so hopeless...

things not going the way planed

recently just went to see my ortho doctor... since my friends will always ask me what the doctor says when i'm sick... so i'm just gonna type it out once only..... "will i be able to heal completely????" "this is very difficult to say.... cuz your case isnt ordinary.... not many people are like u... so just try to bear with it...." "then am i considered an OKU???" "if u want u can go apply for it" so u see i might not be able to be normal again... but every1 in my life have high hopes in me to get better... INCLUDING MYSELF.....

and in another matter... i kinda find out this after my long sleep yesterday night... it seems my sickness always comes back the moment i have problems with girls.... and in this case it happens when i fail in getting a gf..... always feel disappointed when get rejected..... the first time it happen was when i'm in standard 5.. very young right??? then the next is when i'm in form 2... and then in form 6 now.... am i destinied not to be with girls??? or are they just problems for me??? looks like i've got to find it out myself...

S.A.D

every valentines day i would be the one always envy with the couples all around me... and this year is no exception... looks like i've gone through single awareness day all alone again... hate my fate... just have something else to tell out... this year i asked another girl to be my gf... but actually it sounded like that but it isnt... get what i mean??? actually is i told that girl i wanna pikat her but due to my condition i'm not able to do so... till now still haven got a reply... guess i blew it up again... why didnt i learn my mistakes from the past???? only when i've failed only i realised my mistakes.... stupid me....

my current life

who would ever thought that i would be sick for so damn long.... for those friends who have lost contact with me and for your info,i've been sick for like 4 months!!!!! and do u know whats the worst part??? is not being able to freely move around...
yes u heard me right... i cant walk now... not even just stand straight... now i'm actually get the feeling those disable people out there... having to sit in a wheel chair all the time... not being able to go whereever i want and do the things that i want... my life has been miserable.... but what can i do.... i just have to accept this fact... that i will take a long time to recover... and most probably there wouldnt be a chinese new year celebration for me this year... so just hope my friends will come visit me at my house when they are free....